I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
