I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
