he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
He uses pillows to masturbate.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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