How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
