Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
