i barfeds in our rink
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
