Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
