So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
