even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
