he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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