i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
thus making me awesome and them whores
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
