she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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