If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
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