She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
