He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
