Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Umm I'm too high to move.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
