The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize