We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'