kristin has been a bad kristin
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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