waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
A Guy Sent A Woman What May Be The Craziest Breakup Text Ever
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
28 Completely Safe For Work Pictures Of Genitals
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?