NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
