i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
When are your genitals available?
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize