it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
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