But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Randomize
