yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
