Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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