did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
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