3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
