you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
