She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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