I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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