i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
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