found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
