someone threw a dead crab at me
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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