I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
