after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
