just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
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You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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