I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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