you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.