Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..