it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
The feeling are messing with the penis
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Randomize
