next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Walk of Shame today included voting.
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Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
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I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize