so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
