Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
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