there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Randomize
