new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize