Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
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