Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize