You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
