Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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