dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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