Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
